Giant Squid Commando Team, Go!

Originally Posted: July 21, 2010
-------------------------------------------------

Really, it's the only possible explanation for the recent rash of oil spills.  If I were a deep-sea creature, I'd want revenge, too.
---------------------------------------------------------------

The second oil pipe that burst was not as impactful as the first, but it allowed the Squid Coalition to amass the amount of energy they needed in order to begin the process. The head of the squid commando team shrugged his tentacles in frustration before darting out of the cloud of oil that was fouling his oculars.

“That had better be enough,” he snapped, his parrot beak held open in anger as he moved as quickly from the bloom of oil as he could. His second in command spurted up next to him, tentacles waving, his siphons slimed in oil. 

“That was awful,” he snapped, his eyes whirling in his head. “Why did the Sperm Whales decide this was the next target?”

The commander kept swimming, elongating himself until he was a long blur against the darkness of the ocean.

“I don’t ask questions and neither should you.” 

His second in command snapped his feeding arms in frustration and followed. 

“I liked it better when we were in a turf war,” he said.

“Well, that was before the Humans decided to be idiots.”

They swam in silence for several fathoms, gliding until the pressure pressed uncomfortably against their heads.

“I still don’t understand why we don’t just eat them.”

“It’s not our job to ask questions, it’s just our job to gather the energy the humpbacks are going to need.”

“I still don’t understand what they’re doing.”

The head of the Squid Commando Team flicked his tentacles and shot deeper, nearly disappearing into the gloom.

“The coelacanths have taught themselves necromancy.” 

The second in command moved closer, moving water through his siphons furiously to keep up with his commander. 

“What does that have to do with anything?”

From the darkness ahead of him, the commander snapped his beak in exultation.

“It means we only need one more pipeline.” 

The second in command pulled up short to avoid ramming straight into his commander’s slimy side as he stopped suddenly in front of him, his dinner plate size eye whirling in its socket. A tone of reverence accompanied his next words.

“It means they almost have enough energy to raise Megalodon.”